Heart songs are all that I have

Because clarity comes to me in the form of lists.....here is a list of my most penetrating thoughts as of late:

1. It almost hurts to hear the sound of my parents voices on the phone. How painfully ironic that I can talk to them but not be with them. It's as if the nearness of their voices just reinforces the fact that they are on the other side of the globe. There are moments when, despite being in SPAIN, I just want to be in my house drinking coffee in the kitchen with my parents.

2. Psalm 139. Every time I happen upon this one while reading through the Psalms, I feel like a whole new facet of God's love for me has been unexpectedly revealed. At a time when I feel somewhat alone and vulnerable, Psalm 139 is Abba wrapping me up in His arms, something so completely irreplaceable.

3. Spain is intriguing. Being here has redefined so much for me. Because I cannot list everything, here are some things that I LOVE ( oftentimes, ironically ) about being here:

-Time is valued differently. The city sleeps from two to five every day (siesta). Good conversation takes precedence to most other tasks. There are very few 24-hour shops or drive-thru's. Spain is not the corporate machine that America is, regardless of what that means. Life moves at a slower, more graceful pace.

-Coffee - the simplicity of the coffee culture here is delightful. You can order un café con leche or simply un café, and it comes strong (always espresso). Some of the best days I've had here in Cádiz have been spent at a cafe, situated in the middle of some beautiful plaza, journaling and reading. I don't know if I can ever go back to Starbucks....

-Being a foreigner is humbling. Though I would say I can speak Spanish intermediately, there is so much I feel on the outside of here. And in a wierd way it is very refreshing, and it allows me to appreciate the culture from a point of view almost opposite to what I am accustomed to.

4. Lastly, here is what I miss: the closeness you only have with a sister (Annie). Salad dressing. My house and the familiarity of it. FRIENDS - the ones who define so much of who I am. and, TACO BELL. don't judge me.